Jackson Pollock by Miltos Manetas

Saturday, December 3, 2011

I knew this was coming...


Yes I was born and raised in the fine state of WI.  Yes it snows ev-er-y year.  Yes I'm sick of it.  "If you don't like it, move!" How about, no? How about if you love the snow so much, you move to Alaska? Hmmmmm? Didn't think of that, did you? Didn't think so.

I know we've had a very mild winter so far, as far as snowfall goes.  My main problem isn't even the snow.  It's the cold.  Sure, one could argue that when it's cold it snows, therefore I hate snow.  I guess that's not totally false.  To give you a better idea as to how I truly feel about snow, I compiled a list of things I hate about snow and things I hate doing in the snow:

And let's be honest, you like snow, you DO NOT like the cold.  You belong in Colorado where it snows 3 feet, but you can go shovel in a t-shirt.  You DO NOT like walking to class when it's -20 and feeling like severing off your own limbs with a butter knife.  Why you would carry a butter knife to class with you is beyond me, but it made my point.  You DO NOT like scraping inches of ice off your car.  You DO NOT like having to nearly bust your door handle to get into your own damn vehicle because it's FROZEN SHUT.  You DO NOT like driving on the freeway and having to use an entire jug of windshield wash to keep the sh**-slush off of your windshield.  You also DO NOT like walking through all the nasty sh**-slush and having your feet get wet.  If you DO like that, please let me know, because you deserve to own that butter knife I mentioned earlier. 

Come to think of it, you're probably someone fortunate enough to have a garage.  If you DO have a garage and don't use it, I'll send you another butter knife--personalized...gift wrapped...shipped for free...

Just for the record, the first significant snowfall is usually 3% enjoyable.  I was going to say 2% but that reminds me of milk which has nothing to do with this pointless story.  I admittedly admired the snow in the street lights AND made a heart in the fluffy snow in the parking lot.  

Look! I even scrounged up photos of me in the snow!!

I was outside for 15 minutes:

I was forced to do this:

You also DO NOT like this:

K I'm done.  :)

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